This Woman and This Man
by ntbos
Summary: Fix-it fic, post The Squab and The Quail. Because that ending left me hanging quite a bit. What happens after Kate asks that incredibly vague, "Where are we going?"


Summary: What happens after Kate asks that incredibly vague, "Where are we going?"

Disclaimer: These characters don't belong to me, so I'm trying to get their stories out of my head. I also don't own the rights to the song, "This Woman and This Man," by Clay Walker.

* * *

It's a circle we're goin round,

If we don't get us out from under, it's gonna take us down.

See there was this woman, and there was this man

There was this moment they had a chance to hold on to what they had.

How could they be so in love and still never see?

For all we've got to lose is so much to gain

How could we come this far and leave it behind?

There's only you and me to blame.

_**This Woman and This Man**_** – Clay Walker**

* * *

"_Castle… Where are we going?"_

"_To the bedroom…"_

_To the bedroom? Really?_ Kate couldn't help the sickening feelings of confusion and doubt swirling in her stomach at his words as she watched him prep the massage table. He'd put all this together for her, to apologize, to show that he recognized how much she'd been hurt when he ignored her the other day… but that wasn't the issue any more, was it?

"Castle," she called, still rooted to the spot just outside the bedroom door, her feet unwilling to propel her forward with such heavy thoughts weighing her mind. He looked up from adjusting a few rose petals, somehow unaware of the fact that Kate hadn't moved to join him. Their eyes met, and for a split second, Kate could read a hint of recognition in his eyes, hidden by a mask of confusion.

"Kate? You coming?"

She released a heavy sigh, teeth working on her lower lip, still not showing any inclination of joining him in the bedroom. Castle frowned and moved towards her, trying to read the expression on her face, to gauge just how much trouble he was still in. This was enough, right? He was usually given to elaborate gestures in whatever he did, be it apology or otherwise. Or, did he just create more trouble for himself? She looked interested in the massage just minutes before… before she asked where they were going. Did he misinterpret that question? Such an open-ended inquiry… he chose the most literal answer, but was she being metaphoric?

"Castle, I think we need to talk."

She was being metaphoric. Shit. And she just uttered the infamous pre-break-up words. Castle swallowed dryly as his mind spun in a million different directions. He just apologized for the video games and taking her for granted. Did he do something else wrong? Or is it not him at all? Did Vaughn really turn her head? She kept denying it, but it's Eric Vaughn… suave, debonair, _billionaire_ Eric Vaughn. And Vaughn's interest in her was no secret, that's for sure. And he kissed her, dammit.

"Castle?"

His eyes snapped to hers at the softness of her voice. Realizing he hadn't yet spoken, he cleared his throat. "Yeah, sure. What- ah, what do you want to talk about?"

"You didn't…" Kate paused. Talking things out was not her natural instinct, and her flight responses were kicking in hardcore. But this was important. This was Castle, this was their relationship, and she needed to fight for it. "You didn't answer my question. I mean, not really."

"Where are we going?" he repeated. "Specifically what are we talking about here, Kate?"

Kate fidgeted with her sleeve, but maintained eye contact. He really didn't know what she was talking about? How much clearer could she be? They understood each other so well on a physical level, could communicate with just a glance or a touch of the hand… but the subtext was always hit or miss. "_Us_, Castle. Where's our relationship going?"

Castle's face was unreadable as he digested her new question. She watched his hands for a moment as he clenched his fists and then spread his fingers wide as his arms rested at his sides; it was like watching his brain work, as if he needed his hands to help form his words. Focusing on his face once again, she watched it melt into an expression of tenderness as their eyes met.

"Kate…" he whispered. "Do you really not know?"

"Well, I…" suddenly nervous, she broke eye contact, looking anywhere but at him as he moved closer into her space. "We never talk about it?" comes out of her mouth, more like a question than a statement, and suddenly his hands are on her hips and she can't _not_ look at him.

"All you had to do was ask." He'd been going at her pace; taking things slow so as not to scare her off. Somehow he figured telling her he loved her, wanted to marry her, wanted to have kids with her, wanted to grow old with her… well, he thought all that commitment would be too much, too soon. So he waited for her to make the first move. But maybe, maybe she was waiting on him.

"Well, Castle, I'm asking. I just asked, and you sidelined my question." Her resolve was coming back, and she stared hard into his eyes. "Why?"

"Because…" he sighed and took a step back. Because, along with all his dreams of the future, he had his doubts as well. Things were going well, really well, just as they were. Why, as a man twice-divorced with a line of exes and flings a mile long, bring up marriage when things were going well?

"Castle, I can see you thinking. Please," she said softly, "Talk."

That's what this was all about, wasn't it? Talking, or their lack-there-of. Castle took a deep breath and reached for her hand. "Come on. Let's talk."

He led her into the living room, since the bedroom was… currently not the place to have a serious discussion. They settled on the couch, her knee just barely touching his thigh, their hands still connected. Her eyes were still trained intensely on his face, as if she was bracing herself for whatever he might say, be it bad or good.

"You want to know where I think we're going, Kate? I think… I know that this is it for me. That you're it. I want… I want to spend the rest of my life with you, Kate Beckett, and if that means marriage, then I will gladly let you make me the happiest man in the world. If that doesn't include marriage, if it just means you move in with me, or I move in with you, or we're just… together, then that's perfect for me, too. I… I love you, Kate, and that's… that's…" He swallowed hard.

Tears were glistening in Kate's eyes as she squeezed his hand. "I love you, too, Rick."

"Yeah?" Castle couldn't help the grin that spread across his face at her words. I mean, he already knew. She hadn't needed to say the words because her actions spoke volumes… but still, it was nice to hear the words. It was—

His thought process was interrupted by her lips on his, kissing that grin right off his face, and he let her push him back into the armrest of the couch. His hands bracketed her waist as she settled on top of him. After a minute or two, she pulled back.

"We're not finished talking yet."

"We're not?" he whined playfully, arching up to try and capture her lips once more. She let him steal a quick kiss and then pushed him back down. "No, we're not. We have so much, actually, left to talk about."

He wrapped one arm around her shoulders and pulled her down into his chest. She extended her legs so that she was now lying straight-out on top of him, her face buried in his chest, arms wrapped around his torso. "I wanna marry you too, Castle," she murmured into his t-shirt.

She felt him tense; his arms tightened their grip around her. "You- you do?"

"Yeah, Castle. I do." She lifted off of him slightly, grinning as he stared up at her in disbelief. "You speechless, writer man?"

"Yes. Only you, Detective," he mumbled as he pressed a hard kiss to her forehead. "Talk. Talk about the things, all the things, so I can kiss you again."

Kate laughed out loud and angled to kiss his jaw. "I think… I think it all seems a little irrelevant now. I just… I wanted us to be on the same page. With Vaughn, and the video game thing, it felt like we weren't. Like—like we had different expectations, or whatever. But now…"

"Now we're on the same page."

"The same sentence, more like."

Castle grinned. Leave it to Kate to make literary analogies. Still, "I do think we have more to talk about, Kate. Like Vaughn and the video game thing… And why I… why I put off making the first move. Why we were on different pages in the first place."

Kate inhaled on a shaky breath and tightened her arms around him. "Okay."

"And Kate… My track record isn't exactly… perfect. I just want you to know, you can—you can ask me anything you want to know, and I promise I'll tell you. I don't promise you won't like the answer, but… you deserve to know."

"Castle…" she whispered, tears welling in her eyes again. That was it, wasn't it? He just addressed her biggest insecurity, just laid everything out on the table. For her. And from the underlying tone of his voice, it seems like it wasn't just her insecurity. "Was that part of it?"

"Part of what?"

"Part of why you didn't want to bring any of this up? Were you afraid I wouldn't want to be… your third wife?"

Castle sighed, and Kate's body lifted with the rise and fall of his chest. "More like I didn't want to mess everything up again."

"Rick." Kate paused on an inhaled breath. "A relationship takes two people. Two people to make it work, and two people… to ruin it. I can't believe that you were the sole cause of each of your failed marriages." Whoa. Where did that come from? Did her insecurities evaporate, just like that? All it took was the knowledge that Castle was worried about it too, maybe even more so? "And Castle, I won't let you be the sole cause of the end of our relationship. We're in this together, or we go down together."

"Let's not go down together, Kate," he whispered to the top of her head.


End file.
